Is there a pattern you wish to change even though it seems destined to remain on repeat in your life? Everyone has unresolved “stuff.” True, some stuff seems more formidable than others at first glance.
However, what unites everyone isn’t just having patterns that don’t serve them. What really draws them together is a shared inability to disrupt and replace these patterns for good.
You know what I mean, right? It’s easy to bond with another over your problems and struggles. You’re much less likely to share your Dreams than you are your defeats. Could it be that there is a universal attraction to change and yet an equally unanimous aversion to consistency?
Think back to the last “solution” you invested in to solve a persistent problem that kept you feeling stuck that offered you some success, yet ultimately didn’t last. How did it transform your issue? And, how long did it take for some non-serving aspect of it to sneak back into your life?
When you’re stuck in life and your mindset originates from a state of scarcity or struggle, desperation drives you to seek help or to remain stagnant. You will do literally “anything” to make things better if the fear is great enough to motivate you to act. Nothing stands in your way. You are committed to doing all the things to stop the pain.
However, something happens that is rarely discussed as soon as the crisis passes: You stop doing “anything” because things are “working” again in your life.
This is the point where an aversion to consistency pops up. Rather than continue to do the work that “worked” to get you out of crisis, more often than not, your ego show’s up with an appealing lie.
It tells you that since things have changed for the better, you don’t have to be consistent like you were in the midst of your past struggles. For you see, the consistency you practiced wasn’t conscious, it was detached from a conscious decision and at the same time attached to a specific outcome appearing.
This disconnect is the catalyst for all relapse regardless of your specific vice or “stuff.” In order to further pull back the veil of denial, go back to the memory I asked you to recall earlier: The last time you were motivated enough to invest in a solution for getting unstuck. Once you have a clear connection to that time in your life, ask yourself, “How would things be different today had I made a conscious choice to continue the efforts that seemed to help me beyond the point I stopped?”
The irony is that when life is “working” for you, that’s the time to dig-in deeper into a consistent practice of whatever helped you experience success in the first place, NOT pull away from the work itself. It seems like a simple shift in your mindset and yet simplicity shouldn’t be confused with easy. If it was “easy” disrupting and replacing unhelpful patterns for good would be the norm, not the struggle.
Look I get the temptation to gravitate towards novelty over consistency. I’m a life-long, card-carrying Change Addict. I used to be the first one to ditch my mindfulness practice or gratitude journal once life was humming along after a long lull of activity or success. In fact, I’m still pretty much a lemur if left to own devices with my vices.
What helped me was becoming more conscious of my choices and choosing to keep “doing the work” if something was working rather than call it a day at the first sight of success. I also created three questions to ask myself whenever I was tempted to quit a “successful” practice rather than remain committed to being consistent.
1. What’s working in my Present life?
2. How can I create more success using my current methods and conditions?
3. What’s the freedom I receive from being consistent rather than stopping my efforts?
How would you answer these questions? Are there any you would add to your list?
Bottom Line: In this world, Change is the only Constant. And yet, what really changes most when you embrace a mindset of consistency is needing to change what’s already working for the sake of novelty.
Ever Grateful For You,
P.S. Are you ready to disrupt patterns that aren’t serving you AND, replace them with consistent practices to affirm your success so you can get to choose the best version of life you want and create Your Happily Ever Now? I want to help you say “Hell Yes” to this question and so much more.
I specialize in helping heart-centered, accomplishment-minded clients stop the exhausting cycle of choosing change over consistency so they can find the freedom to create sustainable happiness and success. Join me to discover how to disrupt your unhelpful patterns and replace them with affirming redirections so you can Create your Happily Ever Now during a FREE Coaching Clarity Call. I’ve got a few spaces left for October. Grab one before they’re all gone.
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