Being In A “Go Kindly” Relationship With Myself


Hi Kind Reader, I realize it’s been a minute… For the past seven months,  I’ve lived the life of an “intentional gypsy.” By that I mean, I’ve been living in the moment. Each day I wake up with the intention to “go kindly” through every instant by being present to a purpose bigger than me. You might say that I’m being in a Go Kindly relationship with myself. 

My journey took me across cities near and far, into and out of various airbnbs, my parents’ guest room, friends’ sofas, and even one memorable night inside of my car. The new friendships and expanded professional networks formed along my trek produced incredible business and personal opportunities to practice Go Kindly in-action.

contributed to “influencer” publications, consulted as a Live Kindly Coach in various capacities, joined a corporate initiative (thanks to my Work Kindly program) to redefine employee engagement, helped realign out-of-balance bodies via Move Kindly sessions and volunteered my time to those that struggle with similar relationship roadblocks to never give up the pursuit of a life bigger than his or her past.

Without one cent of debt to my name and with no “obligations” other than choosing to demonstrate kindness in all that I do, I begin anew every sunrise and recharge each sunset.

For the first time since my first boyfriend in high school, I am single by choice. I always go from one monogamous coupling to the next, without much pause. Letting go of the “status” of being in or out of a romantic relationship defining who I am, is a process directed by “kind” metamorphosis.

Years of conditioned beliefs, stemming back into childhood, that I was worthless without the presence of a man defined my previous romantic relationships. Let me be clear though: No one made me pick my past partners. Regardless of what I’d been told, It was my choice.

Playing small must have fed some need inside of me to remain hidden from possible judgment if I chose to shine on my own.

Successful “baby steps” aside, life without fear as my compass is without parallel. Little by little, “who I am” is becoming more evident and less evasive. Writing is my “spirit” medicine. Delving into the well of words that define a life beyond the confines of convention frees me from preconceived judgment. It is no wonder that the pages of my first book flow each day with more ease than the previous.

As part of my inner journey, I recently chose to invest a large chunk of my savings into an airbnb temporary living situation. The kicker: Being less than two blocks from the pristine sands of the Pacific Ocean in Marina Del Rey, California.

My “Happiest Place on Earth”

It’s my version of “Heaven on Earth.” Each night the sunset and I rendezvous for a “nature date.” Tiptoeing while twirling the grains of sand with my toes grounds my heart and frees my mind to see beyond seeming limitations.

Yes I am single, living off my savings, and dreaming big without a concrete idea of what will unfold next. That is true. The funny thing: I’m not worried. In fact, time appears to expand and become more holographic in direct proportion to each moment I’m here. Every day ushers in unexpected invitations to share my Go Kindly philosophy in a new professional arena.

Everything fell into place the moment I gave myself the grace to be me. 

I accomplished more in the past ten days than I have in the past ten months. Inner peace is not determined by your outer environment, but being in a place that provides you space to create is peaceful. Detachment from how unhappy I’d been before now stands in stark contrast to the undulations of joy that flow through me without deliberate choice. Anything is possible when you tap into the power of empowerment.

Being in a Go Kindly relationship with myself means no longer giving away my choices to the whims of others, especially “powerful” men. It also means kindly being me without apology or defense. This philosophy is not a theoretical construct that I teach without personal practice and affirmation of its results. It is a practical path that I reflect in all relationships, including the one with myself.

Stay tuned, kind reader for more Go Kindly stories and reflections from my “Intentional Gypsy” wanderings.

As an example of “serendipity” becoming my new “norm” since choosing to be in a Go Kindly relationship with myself, I stumbled upon this sign while “intentionally” wandering along Abbot Kinney in Venice.

image1 (8)
For those of you that know my lifelong affinity for “All things Alice” you will know why this “sign” was so important to me. It means I’m on the right path and exactly where I’m supposed to be!”

Go Kindly, my friends. We are all in the together.

P.S. I can’t wait to share the new book and complete curriculum with you.

Have a story of you being in a “go kindly” relationship with others or yourself? Share a comment or drop me an email. I’d love to hear from you; let’s continue the conversation. All are welcome to join my Go Kindly Family. 


Hi! I'm Nanci Besser Reed. As a Mindset + Pilates Mentor, I help heart-centered women renew and reset their Mind AND Body via Pilates + Mindfulness. I offer private and group sessions via Zoom and other online platforms. I'm also a blogger and frequent contributor to aligned publications.

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